My wife is interested in
Sudoku puzzles. Ok, interested is the wrong word - obsessed is
probably closer to the mark. She's done them for years, has become
very good at them and challenges herself with the very advanced
versions of the puzzle. It's not something I've ever really been
into but the other day I gave it a try. I happened to be see the
puzzle mania left out from the Herald on the couch and noticed a
Sudoku that Carolyn hadn't attacked yet. So I picked it up and had
a go. I solved it after about 10 minutes and was pretty pleased
with myself - until I realised why Carolyn hadn't done it. Sudoku
puzzles are generally rated easy medium or hard. This one was not
even challenging enough to qualify as easy. Half the numbers were
already filled in and it only used 2/3rds of the numbers a "grown
up" version of the puzzle would use. It was Sudoku for dummies
(i.e. me) In other words my wife hadn't even bothered to fill it
in because for her it was ridiculously simple. For me though it
proved enough of a challenge to give me some satisfaction (until I
realised it was the for “dummies” version).
What I found interesting
about this was how quickly my mood changed from "good job, you
solved it!" to "pah that doesn't mean anything" once I realised
that, to an expert that particular puzzle wasn't even worth
picking up a pen for. And it took me a second to remember that
hey, it's alright, it's my first effort - it's ok to start small
and feel good about the results. And more importantly - as I pick
up my first puzzle, if I decide to use an expert as the yardstick
against which I measure myself - I'm doomed to failure. I will
inevitably wind up feeling inadequate. I will feel like any
accomplishments I achieve are insignificant given the monster
puzzles my wife is happy to wrestle with. And so my chances of
having a crack at another puzzle dwindle quickly.
I
think there's a very important lesson here. It's about what
strategy we employ to gauge our progress in any field.
It's about which strategy will maximise our chances of success by
keeping us motivated, ensure we have wins to celebrate and stay
engaged and passionate long enough to get extremely proficient.
And I think that strategy can be stated very simply.
Always compare self with
self.
There is always someone that
is better than you, who has more experience, more mat time, better
natural attributes etc. If our yardstick for how well we're doing
are the "experts" (who are also likely improving at the same time
we are) or even that talented newbie that just joined up (and
seems to be learning so quick), training can become a very
frustrating and demotivating process. But if what we focus on is
how am I doing compared to how
Part 1:
